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Last week
Simon: "Daddy?"
Matthew: "Yes?"
Simon: (enter somewhat unintelligible question here)
Simon: "Daddy?"
Simon: "Yes?"
Simon: (enter somewhat unintelligible question here)
Hava: "Yes, Simon?"
Simon: "Yes, Hava?"
Just as we were finishing breakfast this morning a storm moved in and thunder shook the house. "Wassat?" Simon asked doing his best impression of a Teletubbie. Mama explained that it was THUNDER. THUNDER is, of course, when two clouds laugh at each other. Mama did her best impression of a cloud laughing, "BWA HA HA HA HA!" Simon fake-laughed back "HA HA HA HA HA" which made Mama laugh for real and seeing Mama laugh for real caused Simon to laugh for real. MAT HEW watched in amazement as Hava and Simon brought themselves to tears. Then more thunder claps. "BWA HA HA HA HA HA!" laughed Mama, "HA HA HA HA!" laughed Simon. And then Simon was so happy that he turned away from watching the rain and flung his arms around Mama's neck and they sat there listening to the clouds laugh.
Matthew dropped Simon off at school at 8:15 this morning. Simon didn't need Matthew to stay so he left.
Yesterday there was a lot of rushing around, gathering things together, and filling out forms. We SHOULD have opened the pre-first-day-of-school instructional packet before Sunday night but somehow it got left behind with the multitude of other things on our endless to-do lists. It isn't like us to leave something so important to the last minute but these things happen. In any case, we (mostly Matthew) filled out forms about Simon's behavior and his health and what he likes and how he sleeps. Matthew did an excellent job of filling out the forms. When Hava read them milk nearly sprayed out of her nose. It would have if she had been drinking milk. Since we don't get these forms back, we scanned them in for our future enjoyment.
So this morning we woke up determined not to let Simon know that Hava was up worrying at 3:30 am or that Matthew's stomach was in knots. We were our cheerful-ish selves and Matthew deposited him at school without a glimmer of his fear for the pain and suffering that might befall him - probably the youngest two year old in his class (and most likely the tallest). Clearly we are temporarily insane and we do know this but it is hard not to imagine the worst things about school, multiply them by a thousand, and then multiply that by an even larger sum to account for the emotional loss of near constant parental attention.
Matthew took Simon on the longest short train ride of his life to preschool just after 8 am. He stayed while Simon played for about an hour, until 9:30, slowly being less and less interesting until the breadsticks and apple juice appeared and Daddy in the corner was a distant memory. Three members of Simon's class (the Blue Guppies) cried the entire time Matthew was present which put Simon a little on edge. One two year old was so distraught that he had to be removed. A girl was still crying when Matthew returned at 12:30. Our boy was, of course, braver than we allowed ourselves to hope. Simon really is ready for preschool. Ahhhh...
It was a very full weekend.
Friday we took Simon to the YMCA for swimming. We're considering moving on from the "Y does the the staff have to be so rude?" and "Y do they not heat the freezing indoor pool in the Summer?" to a more friendly atmosphere. We assume the answer to "Y is the place miserable?" is lack of funding but it is hard to want to fund a place that has an atmosphere of misery. Apparently the enormous "God Loves YOU" painted in the gym is not encouragement enough to be friendly. Alas Simon, the polar bear, thinks it is a fabulous place and is not very understanding when his parents want to take a few extra minutes to ease themselves into the water instead of jumping right in.
Saturday we took it upon ourselves not only to get a drop-in hair appointment for Simon but also a drop-in photo opportunity at the local Picture People and use up the deal we bought at his last birthday photo shoot. The closest Picture People is in Hokie Pokie Skokie so we drove there not once but twice on Saturday. Besides having a miserable name which they actually CHOSE not that long ago, Skokie is home base for the Jewish people of Illinois. It has a nice outdoor mall with the same shops you would find at any Westfield Shopping Center. Skokie also has a very nice sculpture park next to a canal separating it from the nicer (so we hear) Evanston. We ran through a small section of the park and checked out some sculpture before heading home (the second time). Between the mall and the canal, Skokie is one strip mall after another. Maybe we missed something spectacular along the way but the first time we drove there we got pretty lost and saw enough of the area to determine that there isn't much else to see.
So by the time we had Simon's hair cut (a miserable experience during which he thought he was going to be mauled by the mean lady brandishing clippers), driven to Skokie, and eaten lunch, Simon was very tired. When Simon is tired he is either punchy, hyper, or cranky. On Saturday he chose to manifest his sleepiness by being hyper which doesn't work out so well when someone is trying to take your photo. This particular Picture People, unlike the one we used in California, uses this stuff called FILM. So not only can they not take a million shots and immediately delete those which are bad, you can't see the shots right after the photo shoot (hence our return to Skokie later that evening). It took us quite a while to figure out how the process works when film is involved. We are creatures of the digital era. As one might expect, the photos turned out remarkably bad. We purchased the two least terrible shots which are out in the mail to many friends and family this very day. Family should feel free to ask for larger versions of either or both - we have them on hand just in case. Next year, when Simon can understand the need to sit still and smile, we'll find a real photographer.
The reason we forced all of the Saturday activities into one day was because we were looking forward to visiting a new museum on Sunday: The Field Museum of Natural History. We saw Sue. We saw lots of stuffed birds and mammals. We pushed a few buttons to hear bird calls and Simon petted and kissed the touch-me animal examples. We visited Africa and Egypt and stones and jade before Hava and Simon declared the place painfully boring and had more fun with a bench and some guys dancing to music in the gift shop while Matthew did a little looking on his own. PAINFULLY BORING but to each their own; apparently there are people impressed by taxidermy, fake plants and shiny rocks. Raise your hand if you find taxidermy interesting. Do you see any hands raised? Didn't think so.
Simon says: Happy Belated Birthday Devon!
This week's photo (upper left corner) is Simon on the return trip from the Hot Coffee Place (also known as Starbucks). We're taking him to get hot coffee (steamed soy milk with a half pump of chocolate) once a week. He is already an addict. When ever he sees the Starbucks symbol (which is very often - we have four within a four block radius of our house) he yells, "Hot Coffeeee!" Hava, on the other hand, is trying to kick the Starbucks habit she acquired over the long Winter.
As we played ball in the courtyard last night Simon began to use Daddy and "Mat Hew" interchangeably. We'd report a sentence but there were so many mixed with filler Simonese. There was talk of falling down and not falling down and rocks and doors and bikes and sirens.
As he was being put to bed last night he requested "hot coffee?" When his request was denied, he changed his approach, "cold coffee?" He got milk and went to sleep lamenting in his sad voice, "hot coffee...."
He woke up this morning asking for "cookies?!" We made brownies together last night and put them in the oven just before he went to bed. He has been having trouble letting Hava leave for work in the morning, asking for another hug or to play. This morning he saw Hava take off with the large bag of brownies and was even more upset. Mama has taken off for the day to play and eat "cookies" all by herself. If only he knew how much she wanted to stay and eat "cookies" with him.
Now that Simon is TWO! his diet isn't supposed to consist of as much fat as, say, it did last week and the 103 weeks previous. Welcome to the new lower-fat Simon. Unfortunately, just being TWO! is an appetite suppressant (for Simon as well as his parents). Simon can eat amazing quantities of mac and cheese in a single sitting but most other foods he can take or leave. Leave means going hungry; something Simon is willing to endure rather than eat what we've placed on his plate. Let him endure? You who thought that are now invited to spend those cranky hunger-induced sleepless hours with him in the middle of the night. (This is where we again point out how ridiculous depending on child development books for advice can be.)
Here is a list of items Simon will willingly consume on a regular basis:
fresh cooked carrots
fresh corn on the cob
frozen fruit smoothies
watermelon
whole peeled apples
steamed artichokes
macaroni and cheese
pasta (though not long stringy pasta) with pesto or marinara
polenta
raisins
cereal
crackers
whole grain fruit cereal bars
whole grain waffles with butter
syrup free french toast
Here is a list of things Simon will *usually* eat but occasionally completely reject:
pizza
vegetable risotto
figs
yogurt
fresh asparagus
mozzarella cheese
peanut butter on a spoon
scrambled eggs
shrimp
whole wheat bread
ripe* fruit (except bananas)
rice
fish
*finding ripe fruit has been a challenge
Following are the things Simon will happily eat while oblivious to the fact that he is, indeed, eating them:
beef or chicken
bananas
frozen cherries
frozen blueberries
tofu
protein powder
peas
green beans
zucchini
mushrooms
broccoli
cauliflower
Hava (maintainer of the Official Simonial Diet Plan - OSDP) has determined through scientific taste tests that you can just about add any steamed vegetable to a blender full of pesto or marinara without disturbing the taste. Throw in some meat or tofu and you have an entire blended meal in a jar. Placed over whole wheat rotelle, elbows, or small shells it becomes a well balanced diet. Want mac and cheese? Hide some pureed cauliflower in the sauce. Dessert, you ask? Low fat milk, silken tofu, a banana and frozen berries blended into a frothy delight.
Unfortunately, the OSDP takes a lot of preparation and depends on there being cooked pasta shapes on hand during at least one daily meal. We assume pretty much everyone has a few toddler healthy eating ideas of their own. What toddler feeding secrets do you know?
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After a four hour nap, Mama, Daddy, Grandmother, Grandfather, and Lala (his new best friend) took a trip to Chuck-E-Cheese to "push butts," ride a bicycle-helecopter, eat pizza and cake, and meet Chuck IN PERSON. Simon got a hug from Chuck as well as a song and dance which was the highlight of a very good day.
When the tokens were almost gone and even Chuck was looking haggard, we left for home.
Although it took him a quite a while, once Simon figured out how to open presents he was unstoppable: "open! open! open!" One hundred balls and a play tent, Play Doh and books, Legos and a Caillou keyboard, a paper bag that sings, stickers and an Etch-a-Sketch - enough toys to be taken out, one by one, through the long Winter ahead.
Dear Simon,
The first six months of your second year were pretty normal - you wanted to be outside (with Calvin) or somewhere, ANYWHERE besides home. Indoors we chased you around the leather chair in the middle of the living room because that was the only space to run. Around and around. We would stop and hide and pop out and ROAR and you would squeal with delight. This did get old. We worried. Your toys spilled over into every room; even when they were put away. We had gates up to block the dining room to keep you away from Winslow, all the cords from the multimedia appliances, the recycling, and the pieces of food that inevitably were left on the floor after your meals. We gated the doorway to the kitchen so we wouldn't have to lock every cabinet door and we gated the top and the bottom of the stairs. We even had a gate in our bedroom so you wouldn't get to sleeping Winslow or the computers. With all the restrictions on space our home sometimes felt like a prison; we couldn't blame you for wanting to get out and explore.
Once Mama decided to look for new jobs, time became tight. Mama and Daddy tried to be excited about the future but everything seemed so uncertain. Where would we go? What would we do? Truth be told, we really wanted to stay. It was Bay Area real estate and financial advisors that inadvertently helped us make the decision to leave. You see, we couldn't possibly afford a larger home in a fun neighborhood within a good school district. When we were told just how much we would have to pay, we blanched. How could it be that people have cute little homes in Palo Alto? Are there that many lottery winners? Did the tech bubble burst only for a few? WHAT DO THESE PEOPLE DO? Where did we go wrong? Mama became incensed. Daddy became depressed. Motorola made an offer. We decided to leave.
The middle of your year was filled with change. We thought you would be upset (that's what the development books say to expect) but you loved it. You thought having boxes from floor to ceiling was just about the best gift ever and then you woke up one morning to find the fan, usually tucked away high on a shelf, on the floor next to a full size REAL watering can. "ALL RIGHT!" you yelled. We stopped reading child development books around then; you are an aberration; in your wake, all child development formulas seem slightly flawed.
You loved watching Daddy fix up the Mountain View house. From the moment you saw him using a screwdriver to replace some hinges, you were in love. You are a handyman in the making. If only you could convince Mama and Daddy to let you play with the real screwdrivers so you could "fix" the electrical outlets! Besides tools, your loves are music and books and pushing buttons, unlocking locks and talking on the phone. You also enjoy cooking and drawing and swinging and running and jumping and splashing. Daddy started taking you to a French class in Chicago once a week because, for reasons we can't quite comprehend, you are completely enamored with French. You sing various French songs (in tune!) a good percentage of your waking hours.
Your first real Winter was tough not because it snowed a lot (because it didn't) but because you absolutely refused to wear your mittens or your hat so Daddy couldn't take you outside for more than a few minutes at a time for several months in a row. Our new house has much more space to explore but you still want to be outside. In that way, this house is a prison too. Now that warm weather has finally arrived, you spend every possible moment outdoors. At least Mama and Daddy bought a house across from a park; they do get things right occasionally.
While your first year was about moving, getting out on your own, finally being able to go where ever you pleased, your second year of life has been all about trying to figure out how exactly to get what you want. Sometimes this has been about telling Mama and Daddy what you want but mostly you prefer to figure these things out for yourself. In your second year you mastered climbing, jumping, and using objects around you as props to get you where you want to go. You've also experienced moments of great frustration when you discover that you're just not big enough, strong enough, or old enough to do everything.
Although you're getting there very quickly, one thing you haven't quite mastered is English. Over the past year you have started many long conversations with Mama and Daddy - inevitably you paused to ask a question. You repeated the question. You repeated the question again. Know why Mama and Daddy were staring blankly? It was because, up until very very recently, YOU DIDN'T MAKE ANY SENSE. Simonese is an adorable language and we are going to miss it once it is completely gone but everyday use of Simonese has caused much frustration in our lives. A few months ago, in the park, a woman thought you were speaking German. She actually started to talk to you IN GERMAN (and you answered her in Simonese). While we used to get the typical, "how old is he?" question in your first year, the most frequently asked question while out and about in your second year has been "what language is he speaking?" People everywhere marveled at how you would go on and on and on using gestures and sounding exactly like you were discussing the most important news of the day.
It is ironic that words can not express how amazing it is to communicate with you. Now that we finally understand you, we hope, for your sake, to eventually stop revealing just how excited we are every time you come up with a new sentence. Some people say the terrible twos are where the difficulties begin but we feel like we've finally moved from the dark ages into the age of enlightenment. Of course we've enjoyed you from the start but now, in addition to being our boy, you are also our friend.
Often, as you lie in our bed pretending to "seep," we stand there with our arms wrapped around each other and watch you, your eyes closed tightly, head on a pillow, covers pulled up to your chin, long lean body doing its very best to stay still. Inevitably one of us whispers "we did that" and we let the thought linger, enjoying the moment of silence before you jump up to "surprise" us, fully expecting to be tickled and covered with kisses. "Night night, Mama! Night night Daddy! Love you." and then the game starts again.
We did that. We made you. What power we possess. It's amazing no one else thought of it first.
Happy Second Birthday.
Love,
Mama and Daddy
How Old? A Short Simonial Movie Clip (you may have to open it twice before it runs) The *Final* Boppy Image Installment One year ago today Two years ago today